The Providence Journal: February 13, 2007
“And the Oscar goes to…..You!”
“Me?” As in, me who put the “you” in YouTube? I’ve been dreaming of winning an Academy Award my whole life, even though I’m not, technically, an actor. Could this finally be my year?
I still tear up when they remember to thank Mom &
Dad-and those are real tears
Let me explain. Several months ago I won Time’s Person of the Year award “You”. What a year it was for me to win “You”! Since then, I’ve sworn off social climbing. The way to the top without leaving your house is social networking sites.
The signature moment of last year’s Golden Globes Award show occurred before the actual ceremony during the all-important live telecast of the red-carpet arrivals. This is where the true YouTube moments happen.
The designer turned actor turned designer, Isaac Mizrahi, greeted Scarlett Johansson with the obligatory “Who are you wearing”, this is what passes for “Hello” in Hollywood, and then, while admiring her dress, he groped her bosom. It’s okay. He’s gay! Coincidently he behaves just like my Avatar!
I myself, or “You” as I am also known, have watched this clip many times, for purely professional reasons! Apparently, it is through this type of obsessive heterosexual behavior, whereby I put the “you” in YouTube, and determine just who is the what!
Before this column descends any further into Grammy Awards-speak let me give Al Gore his due. Whereas the Dixie Chicks were vindicated at the Grammy’s, so too shall “Al Bore” get redemption at the Academy Awards. The environmentalist turned Vice-President turned environmentalist deserves an Oscar for “An Inconvenient Truth” if only for doing it the old-fashioned pre-YouTube way. He went around by foot for years lecturing about global warming with a slideshow!
Social networking sites like YouTube and other digital grassroots technologies have propelled the excellent documentary from the obscurity of film festivals all the way to the forefront of public consciousness. When Isaac Mizrahi gropes Al Gore on the red carpet, but asks him about his carbon neutral tuxedo, you are watching 21st Century democracy in action. This is what’s to come, someone tell the Shia’s and Shiite’s to tune in too!
Yes, the underlying theme at the Oscars this year will be vindication. Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins will be celebrating the recent election results and I say, whew! Relax you’re good looking. I just want to enjoy what they’re wearing and that the actresses aren’t wearing very much at all. I’ll do my part at home, and together, we’ll vote the next sexy, er, cause it’s very own award, one YouTube boob at a time.